Monday, March 26, 2012

Hungry?

El fatto bitcho is back and hungrier than ever. Today was exercise day and damn, it sure gets the munch monster going. I am challenged for the rest of the day to maintain self control and remember that I'm not really hungry. I'm not sure what you'd call this, but I've eaten three squares and a snack and I'm not in need of food. I sure would like some, though. Here's where I used to (at first I typed "usually") open the frig and take what was there. Tonight, later, if choose to do so, I have newly purchased apple slices, strawberries, and bananas, and I can snack on one of those.

My right knee, the one I tweaked last Wednesday, seems to have recovered nicely. I avoided certain movements in the pool and did my full hour like a champ. Rita is an amazing instructor and it would be a treasure to have her all three days. Can't have everything. At least we have her on Mondays!

Richard has his surgery on Wednesday. I resolve right now to not let that be an excuse to eat willy nilly. I was below 280 today when I weighed. It's not official, but that 7 sure looked good. Seeing that 7 is worth working for. In a few months, I'll see a 6, then a 6, and eventually will dip out of the 200s altogether.

I'm in the for the long haul, but I'm still fucking fat.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Still kicking it on WW

Though I haven't posted for a while, I'm still here, still on Weight Watchers, and still losing weight. I'm at 28.2 pounds down and hope to hit the 30 mark on weigh-in this week! I'm still fat, but man, there's a big difference in a lot of things with this almost 30 pounds lost. My clothes fit better, my chins are receding, and I move better, even with the two new knees. I'm back at the pool, no longer going to physical therapy, and hope to be walking on land in the next several months. I'm taking it slow, but I'm moving every day.

I saw this picture today. I've seen it before, but when I saw it today, it made me sad. I know we're supposed to love ourselves just as we are, but I suspect this person isn't as happy about beating anorexia as he'd like for us to think he is. I actually was anorexic for a couple of years in the 1990s and it was odd. It was the opposite of everything I'd known to that point. I was depressed, an exercise addict, and rarely ate. When I ate, I tried to make myself eat good things, but I was a mess. When the depression "lifted" (with treatment), I started eating again, and though I was still walking every day and doing other exercise activities, I started to gain weight. And here I am, taking it off sensibly now. Yeah, I beat anorexia, but it was to my detriment, not to my benefit. It's taken more than 10 years for me to get my ass in gear and get back to thinking healthy.

I'd like to thank Weight Watchers, but it's me doing the work. I cheered for myself last night thinking of 30 pounds lost. I do love going to the meetings. This week, I sat in a different spot and tried not to be so front and center (I tend to sit up front). It was just a small change I made, but one I thought was necessary to mix things up.

This week, my goal is to have a "perfect" week and I'm on my way. I don't want to beat anorexia. I do want to find my way to my goal, and that is exactly what I'm working on, one mini goal at a time.

Monday, March 5, 2012

Time lapse! Progress photos.

Oh crap, I've been gone for a while. And guess what, I'm still losing weight. Weight Watchers shows it as 0.7 pounds per week since July 25, 2011. I show it as -26 pounds between these two photos. Oy vey. Fat bitch is getting less fat!

Begin 07/25/11

-16 11/2011

-26 03/05/12

Added 04/12/2012 -30 pounds

05/03/12 -35

Not a huge difference yet, but I love it. I've had my right knee replaced (January 19, 2012), so I now have two new knees. I am back to the pool next week and am done with physical therapy this week. Rock on, me. Let's keep it going!

(A quick sad side note - We had to put our precious dog down in February. RIP Lindsey. Look for posts including a puppy after October 2012.)

05/03/12: Added another photo to the mix. Down 35 now. Amazing what a little hard work will do!